The Different Internet K-Holes There Are

by Gaby Dunn via Thought Catalog

“Tumblr Shame Spiral

TSS — Tumblr Shame Spiral (not Toxic Shock Syndrome) — is the one Internet k-hole I’m most susceptible to. If I were Rivers Cuomo, Tumblr would be my frail Japanese cellist. I am obsessed. But I made the mistake, in the beginning when I first signed up for the site, of following back everyone who followed me — rather than just following blogs that posted about my interests. So now, my dashboard is a diverse splattering of sh-t I might not necessarily care about.

It starts off innocently enough. Maybe I’ll see a photo of a hot guy and wonder what show he’s from or someone will post a funny quote and I’ll be curious about who said it. So I click through. Once I find out, I think it wouldn’t hurt to type their name into the search sidebar and see what else I can find out about them.

In a flash, it’s six hours later and I know the words to all of One Direction’s songs and I hate Finchel and I think bowties are cool and I want Sherlock to shag the bejesus out of John Watson. I look out my window at the people having fun on the city streets and I pity them.”

Things I Would Do If My Name Were “Benedict Cumberbatch”

A comprehensive list by me via Thought Catalog